Monday, April 26, 2010

The "First Lady"

Have you ever had those days where you got up in the morning feeling good - ready to face the world - and just a few minutes into your day, that good feeling crashed? Whether it was a phone call, a conversation, a text.....you get the picture.

Someone wrote a song once about the difference just one day makes. I can't remember the words right now, but today was one of those days for me just in case you were wondering why I was asking or eluding to the fact that something was up.


To be flat out honest, I can remember very few other days in history when my heart hurt as much as it has today. I could list them all right here, but I won't bore you with that. Anyway....


If you have known me for any amount of time at all, you know that since the ripe old age of 13 years, I've been an avid Priscilla McGruder fan. My poor mom, God bless her, allowed me to run her all over the United States nearly just for McGruder concerts. My dad occasionally joined us, but since he never cared for surrounding groups that were on the same program as the McGruders, he always acted like he didn't like to go hear them. But sometimes that little quirky smile would creep up on his face before he realized it a
nd you knew that he was secretly enjoying what he was seeing in them. I remember one where we twisted his arm and we all 4 ended up on the first middle row of the United Pentecostal Church in Dayton, OH. It was almost like sitting on stage with them. I'm sure Dad wasn't real comfortable, but he did it anyway.

Not only was their music everything in the world to write home about (which mattered to me), Priscilla sang with a vibrance and an anointing that I'd never witnessed in my entire life. As soon as she started singing it was if some unseen power just dragged me into this little bubble of a trance-like state. I was absolutely enthralled with them. Not only their music, but their appearance was just stellar. She dressed modestly and more than anything, she looked like us. That mattered to me more than words could say for obvious reasons.


There were two things about them that probably had more of an impact on me than anything on the face of the earth. The first was, no matter where they were singing, whether it be an auditorium, gym, or Pentecostal church, they gave it their all. There was no difference. If they shouted in one place, they shouted in the other. They had nothing to be ashamed of and that spirit they carried along with them was captivating by people from every walk of life. There were always tons of Pentecostal people everywhere I ever saw them sing - which was many places - but they always had a way of drawing in the others of different faiths who had never witnessed such a thing. People always left their concerts with the biggest smiles you ever did see. Mom always cried through most of them. I smiled through the whole thing and clapped as much as possible.


The other thing that impacted me tremendously, was that for a long season of their singing ministry, the McGruders were very popular - especially in the early 90's after their hit album "Come Fly with the McGruders." Ronnie Hinson introduced them to the crowd that night and man did they ever shine. Their hit songs "Going Home with Jesus" and "Warmin' Up" surfaced from that night, along with other songs such as "I Can Go to the Master" and "We Have a Savior."


I remember more than once hearing the comment from multiple individuals....give them some time...they came on the scene different from the rest of the singers....pretty soon they'll be just like them. I prayed and prayed that they were stronger than that. I had it in my head that surely someone with the anointing like they had wouldn't give up their individuality to become like the showmen / women they worked around all the time. I knew that if that ever happened, I would be absolutely crushed, because the truth was I really adored her.

Tonight I sit here writing 17 years later, and I have to say, I've not been disappointed in them. There is something to be said for consistency. If nothing else, I have been a student. It is possible to sit right in the middle of the crowd and not become like them.


I said all of that to get to this point. In 2008, Priscilla was diagnosed with cancer. At that time it was in a few bones, her liver, and other places. Today I received that dreaded text that said she had been placed on hospice. All of her family has gathered to be with her for her last days.


This morning on my way into work, just a few minutes after I got into my car, I got that text. I looked up on my visor above me and there sat a CD I hadn't played in a few weeks. I took it out, flipped it to #3, and I heard her sing again...."Most of all, I want to look upon the Master - and sing praises when at last this battle's won...I want to know I've run the race, hear Jesus say, I've kept the faith....but Most of all, I want to hear him say 'Well done!' The memory of the passion she sang this song with just flooded me. Needless to say, I got a little overwhelmed.....guess you could probably say I asked for that one! It helped - some tho!

I shared with my Dad on the phone a little earlier a story I read on a blog earlier today regarding her during her sickness. It is said that at some point in her sickness when she was at a very low point, she was unable to attend church because of the weakness. Her husband Carroll left her at home to go to church. When he arrived back home, he walked in to find that she had made her way into the room where her piano was, and when he found her, she was sitting there playing and singing this....."Because He lives, I can face tomorrow....because He lives, all Fear is gone....."

It's easy to sing that when life is doing pretty good, but when you've been issued your "sentence" I'd say it's not exactly an easy thing to do. Never been there, so I can't exactly say....but I'd think it wouldn't be easy. Take a ton of faith to sing that when you're walking in those shoes.

I'm forever grateful for the songs Priscilla McGruder has sung - songs that at times were almost my salvation. Also, I have the memory of the hugs and smiles she always gave away freely - even tho in the beginning I was absolutely terrified to speak to her. When I finally got brave enough, I found her to be one of the kindest / sweetest human beings on the face of the earth. I am forever grateful that I had the opportunity at a piece of her influence. It makes up a part of who I am today.

(Sorry I took up so much space to write this - I've had a million thoughts going through my brain all day.....I had to get it out!)

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